What's to hate about GTU?

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It's pretty much everything, IYAM. And you did. Let's break it down:

Facilities? Hmmm. Joke By Coke? Even with the renovations, they're probably only bringing it into the early 1900s. But thanks for the extra 20,000 or so seats, fellas. Get ready to experience Sanford West. And the tailgate atmosphere? You're kidding me. Who doesnt enjoy that hour wait for a northbound MARTA train, crammed into the North Ave station like sardines? Sure, we'd drive, but who knows where your car would end up, and what would be left of it? GTU students are more likely to vandalize a UGA car than the local thugs and squeegee men.

Students? A more mouthy, yet pitifully insecure group does not exist. Gifted in math and science, they lack all semblances of social skills. The cream of the fraternity crop got its ass kicked by the Maryland band after yet another late game GTU brain cramp. They crow endlessly about their brains and class, then go out and behave like their brains were in a jar back in the dorm, and the only class they show is low.

Mascot? Buzz: the walking shag carpet from a bad 70s dorm room? Dont make me laugh. The nerds think Buzz is cutting edge. No wonder they're still watching Saved By the Bell reruns. I'm sure Buzz will get his ass kicked at another sporting event real soon. Must be the lack of oxygen in that headgear that makes him stupid enough to think he can actually lay hands on opposing fans with impunity. On a scale of testosterone, where 10 is Goldberg and 1 is Flaggot, Buzz is about a minus 2.

School colors? Pick a shade of urine and go with it, nerds. Any one of the 5,000 or so tints one sees around the Joke on game day will do. You can go with the "Hepatitis brown" urine that Billy Bob favors for his game day lid. You can go with the "Zima gold" urine that the band uniforms feature (and when did blue get to be a GTU color? Dont give me the "accent color" thing, either. 75% of the thing is blue). Just pick one. They all look like hell, anyhow.

Alumni? I give you Goldtimer as exhibit A. A more supercillious, self important spin doctor you will not meet this side of the Iraqi Minister of Information...and at least Baghdad Bob could see the ship be sinkin' and he threw in his beret. Not Goldtimer. The recent academic neutron bomb hasnt discouraged him. Getting whupped by UGA doesnt discourage him. Miami and Syracuse and BC coming in to move GTU another 3 rungs down the ACC pecking order doesnt discourage him. God bless his optimistic nature, but he's stridently self righteous about how much better people GTUers are. And totally wrong.

That seems like a good start. Take your pick.